Monster

There's a living, breathing
monster inside of me.
It's growing and choking
Just dying to kill me.
The manifestation
Of that self destruction
The conscious decision
To limit my life span.

So you, monster, appeared
To fulfil my prophesy
That I would be dead by thirty
And I'm running out of time.

But

Have you counted the number of drags
On a cigarette?
Have you counted how many breaths
Before you fall asleep?