Verse - The Bitter Bastard

Glorious

I will not be your plot
point charted on a map.
Your tight tongue slipped today
the words left me changed.

You

But courage grows again
every time I see him.
His face, his curling lip,
the way his chin points
up, so down his nose he
looks, so condescending.

remind me

These scum are nothing
compared with what I have
to unload, to draw with breath,
to paint with thought, to express

my mind

suffers the rigours of
suppression, the individual
is lost in a world
competent, yet absent.

defines me

The time is near to show
these cunts just what
is possible with
the personality glorious.

The great north road - Stale food, staler minds

This has to be
one of the most
depressing places
on earth.

White lines gridded
on slabbed tarmac,
the King, the Chef,
and the Travelodge
watch over a
stopping place,
a brief respite,
a breathless gasp
from the thundering
highway passing
beside. Traffic
heads forward and back,
tunnel vision, blind
to either side.

Pounding onward,
don't stop, lest think.
And this is the stop!
The place to draw relief,
consider my direction,
or make a decision?

No surprise then jump
back on the road
and think nothing
more of it.

Empty inside
but the tanks full.
The road was freedom
and now it is slavery.

Keep driving!
Keep driving!
and don't think
any more of it.

The great north road - Manhood

Am I even a man?
My knob in hand,
dislocated.

Everything's taken from me.
My heart, my free mind.
I can't even wank anymore.

The shell that remains
is a fit machine:
Impressive!

Ambitious, driven,
success at work:
Anaesthetic!

I fail myself
in the most basic sense:
What a great businessman!

The great north road - The Bitter Bastard

Angry, getting angrier.
I won't congratulate you -
does that make me bitter?
I will ignore you in the car park.
Did you see me return to check my handbrake?

Of all the hate in my heart,
of it I reserve the greatest part,
for thee, you creep, you towering
stench of selfishness, you smile glowering.

I apparent, dominate, intimidate - not friendly?
With me it gets heavy. Quickly.

The Valley Aire

With a long calm breath
I fix a warm hard stare
'cross amber lights, shadowed gaps.
Sunset draws down the valley Aire.

Cloud dark 'gainst fading pale sky,
an orange glow threatens, explode.
My mind is turmoil, anger. Why
does it calm, upon gentle hills erode?

So much terror, torment, confusion
beheld. I wake in my sleep
and dream in my days.

But wait, do I sense some relief?
Can I feel again, fill my lungs
with soft air, burgeoning my belief.
My debt not repaid, but my future begun.

Meursault

Lying on an overcast summer morning,
just towel draped over me. Warm air
dries my skin, pale light shimmers in.
I'm feeling quite calm, hoping things'll
get better. Knowing that they won't.

Quite the most exquisite music plays
and I realise what has always been true.
The great gift my parents gave me
is music is my salvation, and I
hope to pass it on. It fuels my love.

Choose Freedom - Thanks Camel!

The air here is sweeter
than the cigarette I am smoking.
The light night sky
hovers over the world I am re-entering.

The met line rumbles past,
bubbles through the stillness.
Nerves in my stomach,
the beginning of some hopefulness.

Now I must prepare myself,
or can I really influence
the path I'm taking here?
Choose freedom. Have confidence.